Awareness Before Desire

I misheard a lyric recently in an old song — and what my brain heard stopped me in my tracks:

“Can’t know what you want until you know what you have.”

The more I sat with my newly create lyric, the more it made sense. Maybe even more sense than the original line.

Joe Jackson’s lyric — “You don’t know what you want ’til you know what you want” — loops itself into infinity, which is kind of hilarious and nonsensical.

It’s like chasing your own tail in self-discovery form.

My misheard version, though, turned that endless loop of wanting into something tangible and achievable — gaining awareness of what’s already here.

Awareness Before Desire

So often, we focus on what’s missing — the job we wish we had, the love we haven’t found, the sense of peace we keep chasing.

But how often do we actually pause long enough to notice what’s already here?

What you have right now — not just the physical things, but the routines, the people, the emotions, the beliefs — forms the foundation of what you want next.

Because until you understand what’s currently shaping your experience, how can you decide what you actually want to change?

Survival Keeps Us Reaching

In survival mode, the brain doesn’t care about self-awareness.

It just wants more.

• More safety. More control. More validation.

But that’s not the same as wanting what’s right.

When you start paying attention to what you already have — the safety you’ve built, the stability you’ve created, the relationships that actually nourish you — you begin to see where your unconscious wants have been leading you.

You start noticing which desires come from fear… and which come from truth.

The Inventory of Enough

Knowing what you have isn’t about settling or pretending it’s perfect.

It’s about clarity.

It’s about taking an honest inventory — not through judgment, but through curiosity.

You might realize you already have more than you thought.

You might realize you’ve been craving things you don’t even like once you look closer.

And sometimes, you’ll find that what you truly want isn’t something new — it’s something you already have but haven’t been giving attention to.

Self-Design Begins With Awareness

Designing your life starts here: with the courage to notice what is.

Not what you hope will be. Not what used to be.

Just what is.

Because only from that place of awareness can you design something aligned — not reactive, not compensatory, not survival-driven.

You really can’t know what you want until you know what you have.

And maybe that’s the most grounded kind of abundance there is.

You don’t have to figure it all out alone.
If you’re noticing the patterns behind your choices and wondering how to shift them, that’s exactly where our work begins.

Reach out — let’s explore what you have, what you want, and what’s possible next.

💙 Helen