Getting Past Survivor
Finally Be The Real You
There comes a point when surviving just isn’t enough.
You’ve made it through the worst—but life still feels like a holding pattern. You’re not falling apart, but you’re not thriving either. That quiet sense that something more is possible? It’s not wishful thinking. It’s truth. And it’s what this space is all about.
Getting Past Survivor was born from that very moment—when I realized I was no longer in crisis, but far from feeling whole. I’d lived through childhood sexual abuse, relentless bullying by both other kids and teachers, and a difficult marriage that drained me. I had done a lot of healing — but something was still missing. And deep down, I knew something better was possible. So I went looking for it.
In the years that followed, my healing was tested in ways I couldn’t have predicted—especially when I lost the love of my life at 54. It was another kind of survival. But even through that grief, the work I’d done helped me keep going. And now, I help others do the same.
This space is a blend of blog and voice. Every post can be read, and many include audio so you can listen right here or on my podcast. Take in the words however they land best for you.
You’ll find:
🧠 Brain-based tools—NLP, hypnosis, and unconscious rewiring that actually work
❤️🩹 Real talk on grief, growth, and healing (the non-linear kind)
🌱 The messy, beautiful journey to becoming you again
💬 Support from someone who gets it—not to fix you, but to walk with you
If you feel like there’s something beyond the pain—even if you can’t name it yet—you’re right. And you don’t have to get there alone.
To read more about my story: The Reason for Getting Past Survivor
When Gratitude Feels Out of Reach
If you’ve ever felt like gratitude is just out of reach, this blog is for you. It’s not about resistance—it’s about protection. Explore why your brain might not feel safe enough for gratitude yet, and how true healing begins with listening, not forcing.
When Survival Was the Plan
You’ve probably heard it: “Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans.”
Sounds poetic—unless your only “plan” was to survive.
This post explores what happens when surviving is the whole story… and how healing makes room for more.
Beyond the Body
Healing doesn’t stop at the body. Discover why engaging all your senses—sight, sound, smell, and inner imagery—are essential for deep, lasting change. Go beyond talk, beyond touch, and into true transformation.
I’m Raising People Not Pets
Being a mom doesn't end when your kids grow up—but the role changes. Learn how to stop over-caring, trust the adults you raised, and stay lovingly connected without hovering.
Are You Gaslighting Yourself?
Think gaslighting only comes from others? Learn how self-gaslighting shows up, why we do it, and what happens when we finally stop minimizing our truth. The most convincing lies are the ones we tell ourselves.
Why Affirmations Don’t Work—Until You Do This
Affirmations aren’t magic spells—they’re only effective when your unconscious mind believes them. In this blog, I revisit the real reason positive affirmations often fall flat and share how to speak to your brain in a way it can actually hear.
Say It Like It’s Over
The way you talk about your experiences might be the reason they’re still hanging around.
Connections That Thrive
Want to strengthen your most important relationships? Discover how to nurture trust, build intimacy, and create bonds that truly thrive. Read more now!
NLP Presuppositions
Discover how the NLP (neurolinguistic programming) presuppositions can deepen your understanding of yourself and others, enhance communication, and improve relationships.
The Downside of Speaking Goals
Discover the surprising downside of sharing your goals aloud in today's digital age. Uncover how the social reality effect can hinder your progress, leaving you feeling satisfied without taking meaningful steps forward. Learn practical strategies to navigate this phenomenon and stay focused on your aspirations. Read on for tips on selective sharing, action-oriented planning, and celebrating real milestones. Find the balance between external validation and internal drive. Dive into the full blog for insights and actionable advice.
Boost Your Self-Esteem: Transformative Tools for Positive Change
Explore the transformative journey of overcoming low self-esteem, guided by the concept of mindful debugging. Uncover the power of self-guided experiences through purposeful workbooks designed for personal growth. Discover tangible benefits and witness the transformative process that leads to a more empowered and resilient self and ultimately raise your self-esteem!
The Power of Words
Our words shape our brains. Expressions like "I feel depressed" reinforce negativity. Discussing problems offers temporary relief but often leads to frustration and limited change. Positive affirmations benefit those with high self-esteem but may worsen negative beliefs for those with low self-esteem due to confirmation bias. Understanding how our brains interpret language, including sensory experiences, is crucial for lasting change and personal growth.
From Chaos to Clarity
Embark on a journey of self-discovery and transformation as you explore the profound insights of hypnosis and the unconscious mind. Through these posts, unlock practical tools to accelerate your personal growth and understand yourself on a deeper level. Gain invaluable insights into how your subconscious influences your actions and learn to harness this power for positive change. Dive into the fascinating revelation that the brain reacts before conscious awareness, offering a new perspective on the mysteries of your mind.
Turning to Belief
Imagine this: a battle within, one part cheering, "You deserve the best!" The other whispers, "No, you don't.” You try to believe, to break free from doubts. Looking back, you long for that confident step into a fulfilled life.
Ever notice resistance holding you back? What if you could let it go, embracing your truth and transforming your life?
Why Listening to CSA Survivors Matters More Than Ever
Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse (CSA) often feel silenced, dismissed, or disbelieved — even by those closest to them. In this heartfelt episode, I share why it’s so important to truly listen. Because silence doesn’t protect anyone — but empathy and belief can change everything.
What Propels You?
This blog post explores two mindsets: "go-getter" (enthusiastic and goal-oriented - moving towards) and "avoider" (cautious and problem-focused - moving away from). Let’s talk about the importance of language patterns in shaping our reality and encourage a balanced communication style that considers both pursuing goals and addressing challenges.
The Cost of Silence: CSA, Shame & the Power of Communication
Survivors of CSA often learn to suppress their voice before they even know they have one. In this honest and deeply personal reflection, I explore how silence shaped my early life—and how opening communication with my own children became the greatest healing of all.
The Family Dinner
When my children were growing up, our dinner table was a special place. Each night, one of them would be the moderator, asking questions that brought us closer together. We shared the best and worst parts of our day, what made us laugh and cry, something we learned, and our favorite memory. These conversations created a bond that will forever be cherished.
The Map is Not the Territory
The map and territory are metaphors used to illustrate the difference between the actual world and our understanding of the world as we perceive it to be. The ‘map’ is our understanding of the ‘territory’ of reality, and we must be careful to remember that the map is not the territory! Let's talk about how distorted maps affect relationships so we can become more aware of how we're seeing the world. The more we understand our views, the more we can update our maps, the better we can relate to others and with ourselves!
Childhood Sexual Abuse & The Dentist
The dentist office is a scary place for most people I know. It’s even worse for survivors of sexual abuse. Here is some insight for both survivors, and professionals who serve them, so we can create a feeling of safety in the dentist chair.